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Hi, I'm Shay.

Welcome to The S Spot!

This is a positive space where I talk about sex/sexuality, publish my toy reviews/guides, and post some pretty sexy images and videos. ^_^

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You Don’t HAVE to be a Marathon Man

I was wondering if you know of any way that a guy can train himself to last longer during sex without cumming. I know it’s a strange question but I’d really like to increase my performance time.

A lot of guys worry about how long they can last during sex, and that’s no real surprise - sex is fun and feels really good, so of course it’d be nice to make it last longer.

From what I’ve read, the average guy lasts around 7 minutes, which might not sound that impressive to some, but seems to do the trick for most people.  [By the way, you're not considered a premature ejaculator if you can last at least 2 mins.]

I don’t think I could really explain any tricks here that a regular guy can use to help him last longer when he’s having sex, but I do know that the classic “try to think of something un-sexy” (like baseball or your dead great-aunt)  is not a good idea.  Like I said above, sex is fun, why would you want to spoil it by trying to distract your mind (which won’t necessarily distract your penis from finishing)?

One method that some people (try to) use is becoming aware of the sensations that your body feels when it is near orgasm and trying to focus their energy on suppressing these sensations for a little while to delay things - once again, I’m not sure that this is such a great idea (unless you really are a premature ejaculator).

So in conclusion, please check out this post.



Comment from CyR00k
Time March 5, 2009 at 2:06 am

I’d like to add (as a man who has received complaints) that lasting too long isn’t really enjoyable for your partner.

Generally, the most common exercises recommended for premature ejaculation are kegels or to simply practice stopping and starting your urine stream.

Comment from Julien
Time March 5, 2009 at 3:40 am

CyR00k’s post was right on, and in addition I’d like to remind people that (especially for those of you using condoms) cumming doesn’t have to mean stopping sex for your partner. There’s no reason you can’t take a moment to enjoy the orgasm and then continue until your partner finishes. The added bonus of this is that after your orgasm you feel fantastic and can focus all your attention on your partner, doing things that feel great for them but don’t necessarily do a lot for you.

Comment from Si Si
Time March 5, 2009 at 5:54 am

I usually go for an half an hour or so or until she cant take any more lol. Recognise that you cumming isnt the end, once you have either take a break or please her with other means. Once your ready again then you can continue. And when you do you can go for much longer :), but remember that it isnt important how long you do last. Just that you both enjoy yourself.

Comment from Andy
Time March 5, 2009 at 6:33 am

well, one thing that can help increase not so much the perfomance but the longevity of sex, is to switch positions when your feeling your about to cum, so your penis can have a little rest inbetween ;)

Comment from Shay
Time March 5, 2009 at 11:59 am

Cyrook, Julien, Si Si - yay! I’m glad you guys have been listening to what I’ve been saying here for ages! ^_^

Andy - sure… you can do that too, but personally I hate it when my partner wants to switch just as I’m getting into the groove of things.

Comment from NDO
Time March 5, 2009 at 2:16 pm

Ummm… masturbating a few hours beforehand seems to help me last longer as well.

Comment from Shay
Time March 5, 2009 at 8:22 pm

Oh that is a pretty good idea too! ^_^

Comment from Nick
Time March 5, 2009 at 9:04 pm

Also, usually if I want to last a little bit longer I’ll have my partner perform foreplay on me first, either manual or oral. Then, I obviously return the favor which gives me a break to recover without letting the mood die and keeping her happy/pleasured/occupied. Then its back to good old sex that (for me) lasts a little while longer.

Comment from Sem
Time March 5, 2009 at 9:32 pm

I alternate between sex for her and sex for me. When it’s for me, I savor the sensations and then sometimes finish pretty quickly. When it’s for her, I mentally count powers of 2. 2, 4, 8, 16, 32, 64, 128, 256, 1024, 2048, 4096… At you can see, I’ve been at it for a while. :-)

Comment from Dee
Time March 7, 2009 at 12:50 am

I’ve found that learning to last longer while you jack off is the best way to train. Build up until you’re about to burst, and then back off a bit. Keep this going as long as you can; not only will you learn to last longer during sex, but your ejaculation will usually be bigger, shoot further, and feel better!

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