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Hi, I'm Shay.

Welcome to The S Spot!

This is a positive space where I talk about sex/sexuality, publish my toy reviews/guides, and post some pretty sexy images and videos. ^_^

I also answer reader questions - so feel free to send me a message and ask me anything. (Check my archives to see what other people have asked too, maybe someone had the same problem you did!)

I've been writing for a while, so go ahead and explore my site - I'm sure you'll find what you're looking for, and if not, let me know!

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[It is understood that all subjects in CBW photos must be of at least 18 years of age and photos are submitted with consent. The S Spot is not responsible for the irresponsibility of others.

All questions/ comments/ suggestions/photos, once received by Shay, become her property and may or may not be published at her discretion.]

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Quick Answers

Hi Shay! My boyfriend and I are having a problem while having sex. He’s my first, and I’m still a virgin. We DID have sex…well not exactly, we did anal and such, but when he tries to enter his penis in, his “hardness” went away. ALSO, im a small petite girl, and of course, im pretty…”tight”. My boyfriend finds it a little hard to get his penis inside of me, it really hurt me A LOT when he’s poking my barrier since im still a virgin, as I said before, he couldn’t do me when his hardness disappears, but I want to know if its impossible to f-ck each other because of the difference in sizes? He’s pretty big and I’m pretty small. Please answer!

If you’re having any problems having vaginal sex after being able to do anal, then it’s likely due to nerves. A vagina is much much more stretchy than your ass and should have very little problem accommodating your partner’s penis.

Using proper protection (i.e. a condom) and making sure that you’re relaxed and turned on will help you be more stretchy. If you think that your hymen really is getting in the way then you should really talk to your doctor about this because your hymen should not block sex unless it is too thick. As for your partner losing his erection, that’s probably due to nerves as well, maybe he’s afraid of hurting you.

In conclusion: talk to your doctor, make sure you’re BOTH turned on, use condoms, and maybe even throw in a little lube too.

I hope that helps!

Dear Shay, I have been “unlucky” in finding a girlfriend for the past couple of years,but now i finally have found someone and we have spent some time together. Whenever we kiss my balls become extra sensitive to the point of them hurting when touched, or even walking. I haven’t had much experience and i need your help.

I wouldn’t worry too much about it, that sounds like the sort of thing that wears off over time - your body must just be extra excited right now. ^_^


Comment from Sam
Time March 10, 2009 at 6:15 am

When I “deflowered” my ex girlfriend, I found lube helped immensely. First time we tried, it just hurt too much for her, but with the lube it became bearable.

As for sensitive balls, welcome to Blue Balls territory. It’s happened to me a couple of times. Just take matters into your own hands when you can, and it’ll clear up :-)

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