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You Can Have Manners Without Forsaking Your Sexuality

I have a confession to make tonight my sweet readers.

I am a fan of what I will acknowledge as some pretty… um… what’s the word…. is it trashy? no no, surely not… well, at least some “interesting” MTV reality shows.  Of course I’ve seen all three Shots at Love,  but right now I’m following From G’s to Gents2 and The Girls of Hedsor Hall.

I’m looking forward to checking out the next episode of HH tonight, but there’s something from last week’s episode that’s still bothering me.

One of the girls works as a stripper/webcam “model” and she’s really open about this work, which I think is kinda cool.  From what I’ve seen, she seems very sex positive (which doesn’t quite match some of what they say in her bio), and sees nothing wrong with telling people about her job when asked.  This openness is what is causing her some problems.

You see, the proper ladies who run Hedsor Hall are not sex positive – they find her work disgusting and they have told her much on more than one occasion.   They are working really hard to try to encourage her to be ashamed of her work – and I kinda have a problem with that.

Of course yes she REALLY does needs to learn to have a filter when she talks about her work: it’s fine for her to not be ashamed of being a stripper.  However, it IS important to gauge your audience and realize when it might be appropriate to gloss over the details (like saying she’s a nude model rather than saying she does “promiscuous modeling” – her words!) – not because she should be ashamed of being a sexual person who strips, but because it’s not polite to make people uncomfortable (esp when you’re trying to win a contest on politeness!).

The headmistress’ “sexuality is disgusting” tactic is just not getting through to this girl, because she doesn’t understand it (imho) – too bad the stuff I shout at the TV doesn’t actually affect how the show turns out. ^_~

How about you? Any thoughts?

stripper pole

3 comments to You Can Have Manners Without Forsaking Your Sexuality

  • Mihal Aviri

    I am breaking my lurking ways once again.

    I agree with you that being polite is good but I also tend to make more then my share of cracks and jokes not only about sex but other peoples sex lives. Most of the time it is fun for everyone, even the people I know who are just about illiterate when it comes to all things sex. Though there is a line it is kind of hard to see, it really is just a matter of how open you are willing to be. I myself don’t have the shame that most do, I have no problem making the joke and getting the back lash if people want to argue and that is from what you said how she is. She has respect for herself and what she does, I think that is all that really matters.

  • Angronymous

    Nothing is more polite than openness and honesty. It’s worse than impolite if you hold such an attitude against someone. If you insist on considering the consquences of whatever you do or say, then at least think it through. Think of the long-term consquences if everybody behaved that way.

    Would you suggest the same to a slaughterer or a soldier? By the way, her parents are from the norm. Most parents completely accept their children’s chosen jobs no matter what it is an especially if it doesn’t harm anyone because they love them unconditionally.

  • I would never suggest that someone not be open with the people that they care about, all I am saying is that occasionally there are times when it might be worth one’s while to censor oneself a little.

    I don’t tell all my friends about my site and toy reviewing because I know it would make some of them feel uncomfortable – I don’t hold this against them, they are still my friends. I choose to not talk about my side projects when they are around because I don’t need to make them feel uncomfortable for the sake of my own self-righteousness. Similarly, my parents both know about my site, but I know the concept makes my mom a little uncomfortable; so when I visit I keep my blogging on the down-low because I can and because I don’t want my make my mom uncomfortable when she sees me setting up pix for CBW.

    In conclusion, all I’m saying is that sometimes, if you want to get along and get ahead in life, it’s important to know when to censor yourself for the sake of others. Yes it would be nice if we could all be open about all aspects of ourselves with others, but the world is not, and likely will never be a perfect place – there will always be social rules that we’ll have to learn and play by.

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