“hi shay, Do all men have high libido’s and what is a normal level for a man?
I’m asking because my husband doesn’t seem to want to have sex as much as me and when i ask him if he wants to have sex he almost always says no which is a shocker to me cuz i thought all guys said YES to sex no matter when or were lol and i guess I’m just use to all the guys who want sex 24-7 i mean most guys i know or have dated want sex like 4to 5 times a day or more if they can get it lol. but he only wants sex like maybe 1or 2 times a week and i would like to have sex like once day that would be great! is there something wrong with him i mean he’s only 22 and I’m 21 and we’ve only been married for 2 1/2 years.
and your always seeing everywhere on TV and in magazine’s and people are always saying that guys want it alot and if you talk to a guy they say that they want it all the time so whats the deal with him? or is it me? is mine just to high? i didn’t think it was. help! “
Everyone’s sex drive is a little different and can be affected by a lot of different things. You can’t just rely on media/culture propagated stereotypes to figure out how you or someone else should be. Just think about how you yourself don’t fit the stereotype that women (esp married women) hardly ever want sex.
If you’re noticing a recent drop in your husband’s sex drive it could be due to any number of things. It may be that he’s really busy/stressed at work which can sap his energy for sex. If he’s coming home exhausted or still thinking about work, he might not be interested in “getting it up” and be more in need of some relaxing down-time. It’s one of the down sides of living in the modern world and it can happen to anyone – if this is the reason why he’s not as interested in sex, then you two should talk about ways that you could work together to help make sure that both of your needs are being met. You also should be making the most of your weekends, when he’ll hopefully be less stressed out and more “up” for sex.
Another reason for a drop in his sex drive could have to do with his hormones. This is something that a doctor would need to check out when he goes for a physical.
But it could also have nothing to do with outside factors, maybe it’s just that your sex drives aren’t perfectly compatible. As I said above, regardless of gender, everyone has a different sex drive. It may be that he’s just one of those people whose sex-o-meter takes 3-4 days to fill before he needs sex, whereas your sex-o-meter is full to bursting after only 12 to 24 hours. In situations like this, it’s no one’s fault and the two of you will just have to work out a compromise if you want to stay together.
This is something that you’ll want to get to work on with him right away before either of you start feeling resentful about the current situation. Don’t be shy about calling in a professional sex therapist to help the two of you work this out if you need it, or about consulting with a doctor to make sure that he isn’t having any health problems that might be affecting his sex drive.