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Reader Question – Just Trying to Get off Quietly

I have only just discovered the wonderful joy of masturbation (go me!)!. To reach climax I use a body massager that my family has forgotten ever existed. BUT, as a teenager living in a small home of four I find it hard to find any time alone to use the noisy contraption in privacy…

Although I do not have any feelings of shame, disgust or guilt during after I touch myself I find it impossible to reach climax with just my fingers and I feel too awkward about using household items to get myself off (food? toothbrush? omgoodness no!).

My question is: what can I use to get off quietly?

Trying to get off quietly in a small home (or dorm) full of people, using a noisy toy can be quite a challenge – congrats on coming this far on your road to solo bliss!

If you’re worried about sneaking in and hiding a sex toy, it might be a good idea to stick with the smaller (but powerful) vibes; those are small enough to tuck away where siblings/ mothers/ roommates won’t find them AND can easily be smuggled to other parts of the house where you want to use them. Something like the pocket rocket, but waterproof, like the mini-mite, could be just the thing because it is quiet, powerful, and you can use it in the shower/bath – the one place where most people are guaranteed some privacy.

Failing that, I know you did say that you don’t feel comfortable using household items, but consider how easy it would be to buy a cheap vibrating tooth brush – no one raises an eyebrow at a young woman concerned about oral hygiene. ^_~

7 comments to Reader Question – Just Trying to Get off Quietly

  • Gadfly

    There was a thing on HBO just the other night where the ditsy blond porno actress with the Minnie Mouse voice (who actually has like a 160 IQ) was talking about the history of sex toys. Anyway, there was a section where she talked about current trends, and there are manufacturers to be found that specialize in selling vibrating sex toys (for women, of course) ingeniously disguised as other items.

    Can’t remember her name …

    But the guys fucking various vacu-roto-suck items still look ridiculous. That’s the reverse double standard of biology. Cute li’l vibe in a pussy = naturalish looking. Dick in a contraption = loser.

    Although, a guy fucking a $5,000 Realdoll sex toy looks naturalish. However, there’s bound to be something pathological about buying a $5,000 sex toy.

    On the other hand, I guess the whole idea behind the vacu-roto-suck with vibrating butt plug attachment is that nobody is supposed to be watching the guy fucking it *chuckle*

  • Rae

    Definitely go with the vibrating toothbrush. No possible embarrassment if someone else accidentally opens a box from a sex toy online order and they are about the cheapest vibrators around (and powerful…at least until the battery start to die).

    My vibrating toothbrush (using the bottom obviously, not the head…heh), got me through living in a one-bedroom/one-bath apartment in London with four other girls. Use it in the shower (it’s waterproof!) and it’s impossible to hear over the running water, plus the fact that it’s between your legs which muffles the sound quite a bit.

    Yay masturbation!

  • Sem

    Nothing is quieter than the Wahl pro, but it’s big and bulky. On the bright side, it looks nothing like a sexy sex toy. In fact, it’s sold as a muscle massager.

  • YamadogGirl

    Shay, you had a great suggestion. I started out with an electric toothbrush, I lived in a house with two noisy brothers, the bathroom was my sanctuary, and they had no clue!

  • Violetta

    My finger makes no noise…

  • Anonymous

    Water tap, girl! Use the amazing powers of the water tap!

  • Maikeru

    Although I’d say that the Minimite might be better that the largely popular electric toothbrush (I believe that they now offer inexpensive ones made by Oral-B and other companies) since she did say in her letter that she wasn’t particularly keen on the idea of fruit or toothbrushes.

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