When I was high school senior (to put it in more american terms), I used to REALLY be into reading erotica.
I used to hunt it down on the internet, sneaking from search engine to search engine, trying different keywords as bait – looking for those elusive hot stories that might get me off.
Back then, it wasn’t easy to find good free erotica, there were no spicy bloggers pumping out lascivious words to feed my desires, there were few listings of free sites, no del.icio.us, almost nothing to make things easy.
But in the end, after a lot of hard searching, I would manage to scrounge up a few stories; some times they were tame, some times they were hot, and some times they just plain freaked me right out.
And, after all my exploring, after I had tired of reading other people’s fantasies and realized that I was more interested in my own, and especially after I had moved on from stories to my own real experiences, I discovered that I had picked up an interesting skill.
I could spot a faker.
That’s right, I could spot a story that had been written by a man pretending to be a woman. I could spot a story written by a virgin. I could spot a story written by a man who obviously was sick the day they taught sex ed at school and who had obviously never come close to a woman’s body since he was weaned off breast milk.
To be perfectly clear, there is nothing inherently wrong with a man pretending to be a woman, there is certainly nothing wrong with being a virgin, and there’s nothing wrong with knowing nothing AT ALL about women and their bodies (though that last one certainly IS a shame and really should be remedied asap – even if it only involves reading a book or my site; that’s a step in the right direction).
My problem was that I soon became frustrated with these writers for coming up with impossible (or incredibly rare) feats of sexuality for their female characters to preform. [Especially the writers whose work frightened my younger self - shame on you, you gave me nightmares!!!]
Sure, the idea of the young virgin shoving a whole bed post into her vagina while she was possessed by a ghost and then banging her dad in front of her mom might sound hot in theory – at least in the mind of the inexperienced man typing the words I read – but to me, that was crap! I couldn’t identify with main characters like that, heck I didn’t want to identify with characters like the ones in many of the stories I found.
The impossible bored and frustrated me – I wanted something that I could actually do!
Thus I abandoned looking for erotica, I was bored and/or scared away by the freaky, the odd, the boring, and the unrealistic sex acts. Ironically, I turned to hentai – where, although my characters were technically unrealistic as drawings, at least I could make up my own stories to go along with the pictures.
A few of us were talking about this phenomenon of ridiculously unrealistic fantasies not too long ago:
Artful Dodger: So Shay, is there a name for a fetish that can’t actually happen?
Shay: hmm I dunno
Naughty Boy: lol
Shay: I could make one up – how about “impossiphilia”?
Artful Dodger: I like that
Naughty Boy: makes sense
What about you folks, any similar experiences? Any thoughts or comments on this unusually random post?