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As a sex columnist, an article about the “g-spot” is just about the most cliché thing I could write. I’ve been writing for over two years now and have thus far managed to avoid writing this article.
“G-spot” articles are so pop culture; Cosmo does a “revealing” piece on them at least once or twice a year and many many other popular magazines have jumped on the g-spot bandwagon. By now most people know where a g-spot is supposed to be and generally what you’re supposed to do to it. But there’s a lot about the g-spot that popular magazines tend to gloss over because it doesn’t make good copy. So, since I’ve succumb to the pressure, let me at least reveal to you the things you might not know about the g-spot, the things Cosmo doesn’t want you to know.
First off let’s talk about where the G-spot is supposed to be and how one is supposed to find it – this wouldn’t be a real g-spot article if I didn’t cover this topic for the uninitiated.
There are a few theories about what the g-spot might be and where it is. Usually what we hear is that the g-spot is on the roof of a vagina (that’s “up” if you’re lying on your back) and that it’s a roughly textured bit of flesh that feels different from the rest of the tissue in the vagina. You’re supposed to wiggle a finger or two back and forth (in a “c’mere you” motion) over this area to stimulate it; then it’s supposed to enlarge and do something magical (that is, give you a “g-spot orgasm”). But looking for a bit of tissue that feels different isn’t very specific.
So Dr. Daniel Goldberg and his crew of researchers decided to go looking for it. They tried to find out exactly where the g-spot was in women by systematically stimulating the entire vagina, one little section at a time. In four of the 11 women examined, a sensitive area capable of producing orgasms was found in the same general region where the g-spot is described to be. So what’s in that spot that makes it so sensitive for some women?
There’s a lot of cool stuff in the roof of a vagina; there’s the urethral sponge, the urethra, Skene’s glands, and a bunch of nerves.
The g-spot has been said to be a bundle of nerves in the vagina, possibly descending from the clitoris. But when scientists have examined the vagina, looking for bundles of nerves, they weren’t able to find any area inside the vagina with extra nerve endings. So, the bundle of nerve endings g-spot idea is out.
The urethral sponge is made up of erectile tissue (like in the penis); when a woman gets turned on it swells with blood and compresses the urethra (so she can’t pee).
Hey! Wait a second; in the original description of the g-spot, we talked about it swelling, so perhaps the swelling part means we’re talking about the urethral sponge. When you massage the roof of the vagina, you’re massaging the urethral sponge as well. It’s also supposed to be highly sensitive, so maybe that’s what feels good for some women – massaging their urethral sponge, not some mysterious, magical bit of rough tissue.
The urethral sponge is also accepted as the location of Skene’s glands. I talked about Skene’s glands in my post about female ejaculation; it’s described as being the female equivalent of the male prostate gland and is believed to be the source of female ejaculation. So when the urethral sponge is being massaged, Skene’s glands may be getting attention too. This likely accounts for the belief that stimulating the “g-spot” leads to female ejaculation. So it is possible that Skene’s glands ARE the g-spot. All the pieces are there, it’s in the urethral sponge, which swells when a women is aroused, it’s in an area that can feel good when it’s stimulated, and it can produce female ejaculation.
But – and this is the part that usually gets brushed under the rug – not every woman has them AND they aren’t even the same in every woman who does.
Dr. Emanuel Jannini and his team of researchers examined a bunch of women, some alive and some cadavers, looking for Skene’s glands and a biological marker of sexual activity (an enzyme that is known to be found in men). They found that, even in their small sample size, not every woman had the same concentration of this enzyme AND their Skene’s glands were different sizes. In some women he couldn’t even find any Skene’s glands at all (these women also had the lowest concentrations of the enzyme)!
This might be why not every woman can experience a so called “g-spot orgasm” and why not every women can experience female ejaculation.
In fact many women don’t even want their g-spot area stimulated, for them it doesn’t feel good, it just feels uncomfortable and/or weird.
As we’ve seen, contrary to what some popular magazines, books, and sex toy manufacturers would have you believe, there is no universal “special trigger” inside the vagina that can automatically give women amazing orgasms. Besides, plenty of women have mind melting orgasms without putting anything inside their vaginas at all.
Instead of telling you that you should be built the same as everyone else and should go out a buy a g-spot stimulator, let me do something a little different and tell you that you need to explore your body for yourself to see what works best for you. Sexual pleasure isn’t just based on anatomy, it is affected by the context and by emotions as well as stimulating the right spots; so you can’t expect anyone to be exactly the same as anyone else.
(image from new scientist)
You ARE the master . . .
XO
Well written, Shay. I love the “c’mere you” motion with the finger. LOL Very descriptive.
My experience has been that some women have G-spot sensation and some don’t. I’ve even had one girl with the most beautifully defined G-spot you ever felt — but it felt no different to her than stroking any other part of her interior.
The best line from a woman who didn’t get those sensations was something on the lines of: “stop rooting around in my vagina like you’re trying to get the last M&M out of the bag — and lick my clit!”
;-)
heee.. the last M&M in the bag. I love it!
I also liked your line, Shay. “Ack, go back to my clit!”
Great article. This makes total sense. I agree that Cosmo and the sex toy industry is doing a disservice by making it seem that all women can/should do this. (have a G-spot and squirt)
Husband and I haven’t found my g-spot yet and I haven’t squirted, but there are enough interesting sensations when he tries to keep me very interested in more spelunking of this sort. But if it’s not doing anything for a woman, definitely back off and concentrate on what does work!
now this was interesting to clear up !
Shay
I have this theory about the G-Spot issue. As I understand it there is a comparable organ in every male and female body. Every organ correlates to a similar organ with similar functionality, such as testes correlate to ovaries, fallopian tubes to vas-deferens, Scrotum to labia etc. They may have different appearance and location but they started out as the same tissue and during development they morphed into either male of female part and counter -part. I theorize that the clitoris is the head of a penis that did not develop being having not received a dose of testosterone at some crucial developmental stage of growth. Going back to what I said earlier about analogous tissues in female and male bodies I suggest that the G-Spot and or the urethral sponge is the shaft of this undeveloped penis. I say that to say this. Perhaps you have noticed this in your “work” the shaft is sensitive to a variety of sensations. I propose that the principle sensation is pressure or rather the rhythmic pumping of that pressure. I think the sensations most likely to be being felt in women based on the description of the way most women feel it is this, the rhythmic pressure pumping. The sheathe skin is sensitive yes but from my experience as an owner operator is that the head is more sensitive to fricative motion such as lapping a tongue over it and the shaft is more sensitive to stroking up and down putting a pumping rhythmic pressure up and down the shaft. From my experience with women and their g-spots and what I read about the descriptions about how best to stimulate a g-spot I believe that the rhythmic pressing on the g-spot, using the “C’mere you” finger motion is the analogous stimulation to stroking a penis shaft. I believe that there are two distinctly different sensory nerve nets in the penis/clitoris-g spot, one for fricative sensations and one for sensing hydraulic pressure. The same can be said for your finger tips there is a nerve net for feeling pressure, sort of the force feedback so you don’t crush the egg when you pick it up, and the temperature nerve net so you don’t touch that red hot stove element again, no matter how pretty red it is.
That’s just my opinion I could be wrong
Jim – See! I told you. ^_~
Gadfly – haha! Exactly, every woman is different and lots of us don’t care about our g-spots. ^_^
DFP – Yes! haha it’s all a marketing scam to sell more magazines and toys and kits, etc. Like you said, it’s much better to concentrate on what works, not that there’s any harm in experimenting with something new.
Kinda – haha you’re welcome. ^_~
Flux – silly! of course our anatomies are analogous! Did you know that everyone starts out with girl-type anatomy? It takes some H-Y androgen (not testosterone, it’s actually not the huge “male” hormone you think it is)to turn you into a boy. So yes, the clit is the same as the head of the penis (you can stroke it too, you don’t have to just lick the tip) and the urethral sponge is like some of the tissue in the shaft of a penis. This is why some women like pressure, some like stroking, and some like vibrations on their “g-spot” – just like how men also enjoy these different sensations on their penis. But that’s not the point, the point is that not all women enjoy having their urethral spong and the accomanying acroutmets stimulated, so people should stop assuming that this is the case.
(Also pssst, it’s your spinal cord that takes your finger off the hot stove and your brain that remembers it hurt, not your finger. But I’m sure you knew that, I don’t mean to destroy your metaphor. ^_~)
Phiew that was a long comment!!
commere you like…wait, I need to reread that.
As always, an informative, interesting, and sexy post!
…so you can’t expect anyone to be exactly the same as anyone else. Amazing how often people forget that …
xx Dee
Expunge that sponge
Stealth – alrighty ^_^
Dee – thanks dear! It’s nice to “see” you again!
Exile – expunge? yipes!
If they get any of those cadavers to have g-spot orgasms, be sure to let us know!
Com-mere you!
~~Ohh, a spoonful of Sugar!!
Kisses to you, Shay!
You do ROCK.
xx,Res. (Formerly,cain,adam,billyb,onlylivingboyfromnewyork,…you know the rest!)
wow you guys are realy dedicated
amazing really
i think all my guy friends will flip when i tell them they had the same body as a girl
heh i’d love the look they’d give me
well anyway keep up the good work
i never learned more from anywhere else
on the topic of the female glands, a long time ago humans were said to be able to change from male to female, therefore each human would need the liquids to ejaculate, thus explaining female ejaculation. it is my personal oppinion that the reason they are not gone from a the female is that evolution decided that it is better to have each human each gender at the same time (thus shemales). great article btw.
Ummmmm no, never in our evolutionary past (at least, not since we were mammals) were humans able to change from male to female. HOWEVER we do change from FEMALE to MALE in the WOMB with the presence of the correct hormones – the female form is the default, it takes HY androgen to turn a fetus in a boy. And that, my friends, is why it makes sense for us to start out with the same basic structures.