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Reader Question – Aging Sex Can Still Rock But…

Hi Shay, I’m 62 years old and just got married to a wonderful man age 59 who is a dream come true. He knows far more about pleasing a women then I thought any man could know. He has so much pleasure in pleasing me and I am so lucky to have a man that can still have sex at his age. I love sex but I see there is far more to it then I had thought I knew.
I do have some problems sometimes having a climax, more than I did when younger. I also don’t get wet like I used to. But I enjoy sex much more then I did with my last husband. I read everything I can to help this matter. If you know anything that can help Please advise me.
I also need some help on pleasing my husband. He has a hard time having a climax and most of the time I have to finish him with my hands and sometimes I can’t get him to climax at all. He does hold back waiting for me to have many climaxes. There just not as hard as they were when I was younger. Although I have had some real hard ones but most the time not.
I read some about a mans p-spot, what is it? What can I do to get him to climax? Our sex last at least an hour to 3 hrs and we have sex about 5 days a week so we both really enjoy it, but the more we know the better.
We thank God every night for each other and are so much in love. Is there any thing we can do to make our love making better? If so please let me know. Thank you for your help

As you’ve definitely shown, sex doesn’t stop being fun when you get older, but it can sometimes be a little more complicated – I’ll do my best to answer all your questions.

First, wetness. Even in younger women not being wet enough can be a problem, but this is easily remedied by the addition of some lube. Pick up a nice big bottle of KY (or whatever your favourite brand of lube is) and keep it on your nightstand – or buy many small bottles to stash around your house, just in case you’re in another room when things get hot. ^_~ You can have your husband use his fingers during foreplay to rub the lube inside you vagina and/or you can apply the lube to his penis with your hands before he enters you – this will do a lot to help make sure that everything is nice and slippery when you two start having sex – things will be more comfortable for you and more fun.

Second, climaxing. Even men can’t expect to orgasm with the same intensity every single time – for both men and women there are multiple factors that can affect the strength of an orgasm: tiredness, arousal, foreplay, the length of time since the last climax, etc. Luckily there are also many things that you two can try to improve orgasms for both of you.

Often extended foreplay will help, it will make sure that both of you are very aroused by the time penetration begins – all the blood will be pumping in the right places. People often think that foreplay is only for women, but it works on male partners too; in the past I’ve had to cut foreplay short because it decreased the amount of time that my male partner at the time was able to last.

Another thing you two can try during sex is taking turns to reach down and play; it’s a pretty amazing sensation to feel each others fingers touching and rubbing your naughty bits WHILE you’re having sex. When his hand is down there you can have him manipulate your clit (which will help with your orgasm) and while you’re taking your turn you can stroke his shaft as it slides in and out of you and/or manipulate his balls (which might help him to orgasm sooner).

Thirdly: a man’s P-spot. When we talk about “the p-spot” we are talking about stimulating a man’s prostate gland. On way this can be done is by pressing on his perineum (the space between his balls and his anus), you could even get a little vibrator and try pressing it there during sex (something like a pocket rocket would do nicely). But the most efficient way to stimulate the prostate is anally – that is, by putting something (like a finger or a butt-plug) in his bum to massaging the prostate. One really good prostate massager is Nexus.
(See THIS post for more advice on experimenting with anal play.)

Good luck and I hope this helps!

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4 comments to Reader Question – Aging Sex Can Still Rock But…

  • exile

    three cheers for dusty love!

  • Strumpet

    Lube rocks.

  • Jim

    5 days a week!?! DAMN!!! That’s my dream retirement plan, lol. Good for them.


  • "squiffy"

    I just wanted to weigh in on this question/post. Twice in the last few months, I have met with a friend of mine to get penetrated with her dildo and strap-on harness. While I’m not sure that she and her “penis” have directly stimulated my prostate, my orgasms were very intense and lasted much longer then normal. The feeling of being penetrated is just amazing, especially if it is by a sexy woman. Shay, are you up for it?

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