“I have three questions. I’ll be straight and to the point, then provide background. Alright? Here goes. My boyfriend is a little dense when it comes to sexual things, what’s the best way to go about teaching him? And two, do scratches in the va-goo heal quickly, or would they easily be infected? And the last, but most perplexing. How does one go about sexing when the two persons are different size catagories. (i.e. Fluffy large framed femme and medium fairly built male.)“
For your first question, I guess the best advice I can give you is for you to just tell him what you like.
I get that sometimes this seems tricky because people don’t want to seem bossy or overly demanding in bed, but there are subtle ways to do this. A lot of guys (esp the ones who care about how their partner is enjoying themselves) pay close attention to their partner’s reactions – what kind of things make them moan, gasp, or pull away.
So give him lots of positive reinforcement (moaning, telling him “that’s the spot”, etc) when he does stuff that you like. When he does stuff that you don’t like, or isn’t quite hitting the mark, try just gently grabbing his hand or body and shifting him/you until things are where and how you like them.
Another thing you can try is watching a little porn together. While you’re watching, point out things to him that you think might be fun to try or that you think might feel good – “ooh I bet that feels nice, do you want to try that?”
Next, vaginal scratches – yeah, if possible avoid having anything scratchy go anywhere near your vagina. He should be keeping his nails short (and clean!) if he wants his fingers inside you. Little surface scratches like that should heal fairly quickly, but look out for any soreness or swelling that lasts more than a day or two.
And finally, managing size differences – it’s not difficult usually, there are a number of positions where size doesn’t matter much – like any position where he’s entering you from behind (doggy style, spooning, etc). Try sitting on your desk while he stands between your thighs – that way you can face each other and he can fondle you, etc, while you have sex without either of you having to be on top of the other. (Pssst: this is also a great position for dealing with high differences!)
Good luck!
