There’s a girl who I like, and who likes me (what can I say, the hard part is already over) and we would be sexual, except she takes an antidepressant which has eliminated her sexual response. While I know ultimately her switching medicines is the solution, I wanted to know does this generally numb the body, or is there a way with the proper care and attention that I could pleasure her here. Anyway, keep up the good work, and thank you in advance.“
The thing is, a lot of drugs used for treating depression are selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors (SSRI’s) [Low levels of the neurochemical serotonin in the brain is associated with depression; SSRI's will prevent the body from reabsorbing this chemical so quickly, which means that there's more of it hanging around to cheer you up.] Unfortunately increasing the levels of serotonin in the brain can also decrease the levels of dopamine and testosterone (the brain’s sexual pleasure and sexual desire chemicals). This means that someone taking an SSRI drug for depression (or anxiety) may not only want sex less, but also enjoy sexual stimulation less.
In women especially, the mental part of sex plays a big role in sexual pleasure and enjoyment, so taking something that dulls your experience can really kill things in the bedroom. However, if she needs the antidepressants, well… she needs them, so a good option could be looking into having her psychiatrist prescribe something else that will still keep her mentally healthy but will allow for her to be sexually healthy as well (therapy can also play a key role in this area).
If she’s new to this particular medication, you could try waiting a little while; some people taking SSRI’s will find that their sexual desire does come back once their body has had some time to adjust to the drug.
She could also consider doing something called a “drug holiday”, where she stops taking her medication for a couple of days once in a while – but she would have to check with her doctor before trying something like this as it could be dangerous depending on the drug/dosage she’s on.
In the meantime, you can do other things to be physically close, and work towards more sexual fun: massages are a great way to be physically close and explore each-others’ bodies; also, showering and bathing together is another way to spend fun naked time together without putting to much sexual pressure on the situation (though if you end up getting a hand-job, that wouldn’t be so bad, would it? ^_~).