Comments on: "Can’t I at least SEE them!?"

By: Silent Child

Silent Child — Mon, 05 Dec 2005 14:27:00 +0000

Yes,

If you are with someone and their ideal and perceptions of certain things, intimacy, sex, goals, family etc are different or over the course of the relationship have changed then people have the right to get out of the relationship.

By: Ellie

Ellie — Sun, 04 Dec 2005 03:49:00 +0000

This is a subject that I rant on regularly. I meet so many men that are treated like perverts because they have sex drives. What the fuck!? I'm tired of talking to guys that are made to feel like monsters because of this sort of thing.

While this ex-girlfriend in question is fully justified in deciding whatever she wants about her body, your friend is also free to make decisions about his. His decision is that he wants to have sex and breaking up with someone that doesn't have the same goals as him or perspective on the relationship is completely reasonable.

Sorry for the outburst but this stuff makes me mad and sad, I'm really glad you made the post.

By: Jay

Jay — Sun, 04 Dec 2005 03:26:00 +0000

you dont say how old but if over 18 a year and half is to long if she if you dont love me and me you by now enough for sexxual intamacy you never will. why stay with someone when its going nowhere women call me a jerk if you want but i met my wife had sex 3 months later and 25 years later we are still in love very much

By: Late Starter

Late Starter — Sat, 26 Nov 2005 23:44:00 +0000

As someone whose first partner not only wouldn’t consider anything more than chaste contact *before * marriage but also kept this up for over two years *afterwards* I have fairly strong views on this point.

Couples should know that they’re sexually compatible enough to consider spending the rest of their lives *before* marriage. How on earth can they do that without having had some sexual experience beforehand?

By: Desireous

Desireous — Sat, 26 Nov 2005 15:53:00 +0000

You bring up a good point. Overall our society has a real cruddy outlook on sex. In fact our society is far more accepting of violence in comparison to sex. I think people are afraid of their sexuality and don’t understand it. Thus if someone is leaving another for the lack of sex they must be bad. I’m not sure what we can do to change this outlook. It is so deeply ingrained in us. I suppose our blogging and being honest about our sex lives is a step in that direction….

Hugs
Des

By: JStrap

JStrap — Sat, 26 Nov 2005 14:48:00 +0000

Shay

I've awarded you your rating, as requested. You get a dual award, not the first I'm afraid as Figleaf got that this morning. But a dual non the less.

Johannes

By: :P fuzzbox

:P fuzzbox — Sat, 26 Nov 2005 13:47:00 +0000

I had a girlfriend like that in high school. I went to great lengths for more intimacy. I even attended church with her in spite of being a total heathen. I eventually ended up having a fling with her best friend. I know it was a shitty thing to do but after six months of frustration, I have learned to live with myself.

By: hasarder

hasarder — Sat, 26 Nov 2005 05:28:00 +0000

Great post Shay, really made me think.
It’s true that as adults most of us tend to accept sex as a nessicary part of a fulfilling relationship. Yet those hangovers from being a teenager seem to come back when we think about leaving through lack of, and we feel guilty over again.
Its so blurry when you’re young. No one wants to be pushed into something they don’t want to do. But when I was young I didn’t have much sympathy for girls who kept their guys waiting…and waiting…and waiting. If you don’t want physical intimacy, why have a boyfriend at all?

By: AlwaysArousedGirl

AlwaysArousedGirl — Sat, 26 Nov 2005 04:46:00 +0000

Demon Queen, I’ve so missed you.

By: Shay

Shay — Sat, 26 Nov 2005 02:05:00 +0000

DQ!! I’d wondered where you’d scampered off to! Welcome back at last – you’d better have a good excuse, before I take you over my knee!

Actually, I’m not sure what was up with the girl in question. I asked my friend why they broke up and he said that SHE broke it off. Apperantly she could tell that he’s a “long term relationship” kinda guy and was worried that it would just get harder and harder to break things off so that she could “experience” other men before she “settled down”.